I gets regular tune ups from all my sluts, they polish my bolts and tighten my nuts.
Got a brand new high-speed modem and a silver plated scrotum.
That's what I'm talkin' about. Why doesn't conan do that bit any more?
I never took hallucinogenic drugs because I never wanted my consciousness expanded one unnecessary iota. -Fran Lebowitz
Ain't it the truth. I got this from here. Because I stole content, I may be prosecuted by Dewey, Cheetham and Howe, Tom and Ray Magliozzi's Lawyers. I better watch out.
I sleep on a futon, myself. These things are horrible. What is the selling point behind a futon?Well, in the daytime, it’s an uncomfortable couch. And in the night time, it becomes an even more uncomfortable bed.Wow! Wrap that baby up. Roll that baby up. Fold that baby up.
More hilarity from Dr. Katz. All it is is a forum for stand-up comedy, but I love it.
"I love music, man, I used to go out with a girl that worked for a record company, that is the coolest job in the world. After our first date, she sent me a whole bunch of new cds in the mail." "Oh great." "Now I just have to take her out three more times in the next five years."
A guy goes to a psychiatrist. "Doc, I keep having these alternating recurring dreams. First I'm a teepee, then I'm a pup tent, then I'm a teepee, then I'm a pup tent. It's driving me crazy. What's wrong with me?"
The doctor replies, "It's very simple. You're two tents."
ha ha ha.